Should We Stay?
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Man, this place can be depressing.
I really want to make this a home for the next few years. I’m tired of moving around and I want to stay settled for some time. I was hoping this could be a place to do that. More and more, however, I am beginning to wonder if this is such a good plan.
Let’s start with Zachary. I want him to be able to establish some long term relationships. I don’t want him to grow up living in thirty-seven different places. Unfortunately, there are several factors working against him here. The first is the lack of English among the kids. Since this is not a truly international school, the language of default for the kids is Spanish. This makes it extremely difficult for Zman to make new friends. One on one is fine, but get them in a group and everyone falls back on Spanish; a language that at this point is all but impossible for him to understand. This, compounded with his eye sight issues, overwhelm him completely. I know that some of these things will be alleviated over the next year. I would hope that the longer we live here, the easier the language will be.
The second is the distinct class issues. All of his classmates are rich. They are not just well off, they are rich. They live a life that I have never experienced nor wanted to experience. It’s hard because there will always be that difference even without language issues. At events, there is a definite distinction between the other parents and us. We are, after all, only teachers. This places us perhaps a half-step above the nannies. This situation will never be rectified and will always present challenges.
Friday in class, we were talking about life in school. I was relating some personal experiences; from teaching as well as student life. One student asked if I went to private school. When I said no, she asked me why. I told her that we could never afford private school. She asked me why. She had no concept of the idea that there may be things that one cannot afford. She gets whatever she wants. Money in her house is no issue; it never has been and it never will be.
Since there are only two other ex-pats with kids, there are very few options for us to try something different. It’s frustrating. It makes me wonder whether staying here is a good idea or not. I want to make this work, but I am teetering on saying “No way!”
Another concern I have has to do with the school itself. No matter how much noise we make, the administration doesn’t pay any attention. Our entire curriculum is woefully old. The math piece in particular is practically useless. It does not work for our population whatsoever. We desperately need a new program to replace this ten year old piece.
When this school was started, the population was mostly American. There were Cub Scout groups and everything. It has been within the last ten years that a shift has taken place. As Mr. Chavez has nationalized industries he has scared off foreign investment. These investors were our main clientele. English was their primary language. Today our population is mostly Venezuelan. They are native Spanish speakers learning English as a second or third language. This represents a dramatic change, but the methods and materials have not changed to embrace these differences.
There seems to be plenty of money for new plants, new bathrooms, and catered meals for meetings, but little for the actual education of the students. This doesn’t sit well with either one of us and may be the nail that closes the coffin. Our elementary principal has been at this school for twenty – eight years. She has seen a lot of changes in that time and she has been opposed to each and every one of them.
We’ll do another year, but the jury is out on whether that will turn into something longer or not. We are at a crossroads in our international life. Do we stay? Do we move? Do we go back to the States? Do we find another overseas gig? These questions continue to plague us. I’ll let you know what we come up with.
MJR
Man, this place can be depressing.
I really want to make this a home for the next few years. I’m tired of moving around and I want to stay settled for some time. I was hoping this could be a place to do that. More and more, however, I am beginning to wonder if this is such a good plan.
Let’s start with Zachary. I want him to be able to establish some long term relationships. I don’t want him to grow up living in thirty-seven different places. Unfortunately, there are several factors working against him here. The first is the lack of English among the kids. Since this is not a truly international school, the language of default for the kids is Spanish. This makes it extremely difficult for Zman to make new friends. One on one is fine, but get them in a group and everyone falls back on Spanish; a language that at this point is all but impossible for him to understand. This, compounded with his eye sight issues, overwhelm him completely. I know that some of these things will be alleviated over the next year. I would hope that the longer we live here, the easier the language will be.
The second is the distinct class issues. All of his classmates are rich. They are not just well off, they are rich. They live a life that I have never experienced nor wanted to experience. It’s hard because there will always be that difference even without language issues. At events, there is a definite distinction between the other parents and us. We are, after all, only teachers. This places us perhaps a half-step above the nannies. This situation will never be rectified and will always present challenges.
Friday in class, we were talking about life in school. I was relating some personal experiences; from teaching as well as student life. One student asked if I went to private school. When I said no, she asked me why. I told her that we could never afford private school. She asked me why. She had no concept of the idea that there may be things that one cannot afford. She gets whatever she wants. Money in her house is no issue; it never has been and it never will be.
Since there are only two other ex-pats with kids, there are very few options for us to try something different. It’s frustrating. It makes me wonder whether staying here is a good idea or not. I want to make this work, but I am teetering on saying “No way!”
Another concern I have has to do with the school itself. No matter how much noise we make, the administration doesn’t pay any attention. Our entire curriculum is woefully old. The math piece in particular is practically useless. It does not work for our population whatsoever. We desperately need a new program to replace this ten year old piece.
When this school was started, the population was mostly American. There were Cub Scout groups and everything. It has been within the last ten years that a shift has taken place. As Mr. Chavez has nationalized industries he has scared off foreign investment. These investors were our main clientele. English was their primary language. Today our population is mostly Venezuelan. They are native Spanish speakers learning English as a second or third language. This represents a dramatic change, but the methods and materials have not changed to embrace these differences.
There seems to be plenty of money for new plants, new bathrooms, and catered meals for meetings, but little for the actual education of the students. This doesn’t sit well with either one of us and may be the nail that closes the coffin. Our elementary principal has been at this school for twenty – eight years. She has seen a lot of changes in that time and she has been opposed to each and every one of them.
We’ll do another year, but the jury is out on whether that will turn into something longer or not. We are at a crossroads in our international life. Do we stay? Do we move? Do we go back to the States? Do we find another overseas gig? These questions continue to plague us. I’ll let you know what we come up with.
MJR
posted by Bronx to Timbuktu at 5:51 PM
3 Comments:
Hi folks, you don't know me but Carrie's dad was my first boss when I was 13 & he hired me as a jr. camp counselor at the local "Y" in N.Y. We've kept in touch all these yrs. I've enjoyed reading your blogs & keeping up with your travels and adventures and have thought about leaving a comment in the past but never have but can't keep my mouth shut this time. In your blog you didn't say anything positive so why would you want to stay especially when it would have such an impact on Zachary? Just my thought.
Becky
I just erased all of my comments...they kind of riffed on what Becky had to say...
Beyond the beauty and the "away-ness" of Venezuela...I'm not sure it's a place you'd both feel at home, long term. Being "American" will hang with you for years...putting you in some in-between land--between "the people" the elite. Is it "home"?? Or is it "not America"...?
I'd love to hear you work through your thoughts/feelings about what it means to you--to your sense of Self--to be an expatriate...to live away from the sometimes boringly familiar day-to-day that is "American life"...
Susanna
(Just thoughts--not criticism--it just seems like you're on the brink of some big decisions, so I'm asking some "pushy" questions...)
As you may remember, our family moved around every year or so when I was a kid, too. We didn't move to different countries, but we might as well have - midwest to California, LA to Chicago.
As Eric and I have looked back on it, we're actually happy we moved around a lot. It taught us self-reliance, the importance of making friends, and how to fit in in a variety of situations.
You guys are giving Zachary an *amazing* gift by showing him that people live in a myriad of different ways - and that he has something in common with all of them, whether it be the impoverished in Africa or the upper echelon of Venezuela.
He may never drive or see the way we do, but there are kids in America that have never been out of their *state*, and he's a world traveller at the age of five (or is it six now?).
Don't worry about him when it comes to making the decision to stay or go. The stability he needs comes from the two of you - not from which four walls you call home today. You're his foundation and for now, that's enough. Stay if it works for you, go if you must. Just be there for him, and it won't matter where "there" is.
--Lisa
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